I said open the "SCREEN not SPLEEN" rut row who let her have the Scissors?

Can I go on record as saying "Cool, one can become a certified nursing assistant in 17 days?" AND Please don't let them assist on me" . If your in that big of a hurry you don't like school and if you don't like school then you probably don't like the home work and well when the doctor requests someone to open the screen , I don't want you to get scissor happy and go for my spleen!!